Isa glanced away and closed his eyes, brows furrowed as if in pain as he felt that nuzzling, trying not to get emotional. It was so overwhelming. The truth of what was happening to him, knowing that Xehanort could take over at any time and do something horrible.
"Lea. If we did... if I came with you... you know what might happen. Would probably happen. If something happened to you because of him. If he used me to hurt you again, I don't know if I could come back from that." He may not have injured Lea back when he'd saved Sora, but he'd attacked him.
The memory was fuzzy, but it was there. He remembered how utterly powerless he felt, how he couldn't control a thing, how he was barely aware of himself and even though he could see what was happening, he didn't feel anything.
He knew. It ate at him, knowing he was nowhere near strong enough to challenge Xehanort. He knew better than to stupidly challenge him then and there. Knowing that he had the means but not the power to use it to save Isa from a fate that he'd led him into... Lea stayed close to Isa's neck, breathing in his scent, wanting to commit it to memory. "I'll find a way. You know me. Always going around the rules."
The words stuck in his throat, but he managed: "I promise."
It was difficult to believe. Isa didn't want to have so little faith, but it was difficult to hold to something that even remotely resembled optimism. Not when Xehanort could resurface at any moment and inflict some serious damage, be it physical or otherwise. Likely a combination.
"... I suppose I can't stop you. Even though it's stupid. You're going to get hurt and it's going to be my fault. But you'll just turn it around and you'll take all the blame and you won't be able to forgive yourself. It isn't fair to you."
Sighing softly, he turned to nuzzle at his hair, finally returning some of his affection.
"I'm going to be stubborn till the day I die, you know that."
He'd even tried to charge "Ansem" even after Isa had lost his heart. That ended well. Sarcasm aside, Isa was right about that. Not so much everything else. "It's not your fault. We both know whose fault it is."
Lea turned and planted a kiss against Isa's neck. "Once this is over, I'm buying you all the ice cream you want."
"I know. I've seen you die." He mumbled quietly, not wanting to think back to that. "And you were stubborn even afterward... not even death could stop that."
Golden eyes closed and he tilted his head, as much to look away as it was to give Lea more room to nuzzle and explore if he so wished.
"... I do know whose fault it is. And he's listening. And he can surface at any time, Lea. He'll make me hurt you and that isn't something I can risk, nor something you should be so eager to risk. No matter how tempting all of that ice cream sounds."
Lea grumbled, kissing the spot on his neck again, securing his lips over the soft skin and sucking on it, intent on making a mark. He never wanted to let go of Isa. Not after everything they'd been through. Were still going through. But he was right, and it hurt. Part of him wanted to take Isa back to his room and say to hell with Xehanort. But the fact that the old man would still be watching them...
The dark hickey he was leaving on the tanned skin was meant to be a message. He only wanted Isa. Not the tagalong.
Lea pulled away, leaving one last kiss on the blemished skin. His green eyes had some of Axel's fire in them, not so much scheming as deadly serious. "...You have to go, then. But I'll be coming to get you back. And I won't be alone. That's a promise."
no subject
Date: 2015-07-05 06:40 am (UTC)Isa glanced away and closed his eyes, brows furrowed as if in pain as he felt that nuzzling, trying not to get emotional. It was so overwhelming. The truth of what was happening to him, knowing that Xehanort could take over at any time and do something horrible.
"Lea. If we did... if I came with you... you know what might happen. Would probably happen. If something happened to you because of him. If he used me to hurt you again, I don't know if I could come back from that." He may not have injured Lea back when he'd saved Sora, but he'd attacked him.
The memory was fuzzy, but it was there. He remembered how utterly powerless he felt, how he couldn't control a thing, how he was barely aware of himself and even though he could see what was happening, he didn't feel anything.
no subject
Date: 2015-07-05 08:13 am (UTC)The words stuck in his throat, but he managed: "I promise."
no subject
Date: 2015-07-05 08:24 am (UTC)"... I suppose I can't stop you. Even though it's stupid. You're going to get hurt and it's going to be my fault. But you'll just turn it around and you'll take all the blame and you won't be able to forgive yourself. It isn't fair to you."
Sighing softly, he turned to nuzzle at his hair, finally returning some of his affection.
"None of this is."
no subject
Date: 2015-07-10 05:48 am (UTC)He'd even tried to charge "Ansem" even after Isa had lost his heart. That ended well. Sarcasm aside, Isa was right about that. Not so much everything else. "It's not your fault. We both know whose fault it is."
Lea turned and planted a kiss against Isa's neck. "Once this is over, I'm buying you all the ice cream you want."
no subject
Date: 2015-07-13 04:56 pm (UTC)Golden eyes closed and he tilted his head, as much to look away as it was to give Lea more room to nuzzle and explore if he so wished.
"... I do know whose fault it is. And he's listening. And he can surface at any time, Lea. He'll make me hurt you and that isn't something I can risk, nor something you should be so eager to risk. No matter how tempting all of that ice cream sounds."
no subject
Date: 2015-07-14 04:54 am (UTC)The dark hickey he was leaving on the tanned skin was meant to be a message. He only wanted Isa. Not the tagalong.
Lea pulled away, leaving one last kiss on the blemished skin. His green eyes had some of Axel's fire in them, not so much scheming as deadly serious. "...You have to go, then. But I'll be coming to get you back. And I won't be alone. That's a promise."